board77

AH! right...that's....yes I get it now, and I also agree with what you say...can I agree with what you say and with what Eru says? Or are they opinions that contradict each other? Or are they just for two different options...this is the state of my brain, high school never taught me nothing except where to hide cheat sheets.
Sorry, didn't mean to go all 'Poor misunderstood me' on you. I just have a knack for confusing myself, and in the end someone needs to tell me what I said and what they said and how it goes together.

Well I said what I said and I think that's enough, lol. I'll be content with that.



(I need to gain confidence somehow)

Rodia: I need to gain confidence somehow



Can one agree with both Eru and myself? Ummm ... yes. It's not a choice, it's more like a continuum. How much confidentiality can one expect, how much discontent can one express without annoying others, what should be our 'tone' when we discuss the impact of others on our mood here at B77 .... and so one.

Jn

*nods* Thanks....that does make it clearer. I'm easily confused.

Now I'll stop derailing and let people say what they think.

& admiration for Jnyusa The Very Helpful.

Ro, I I agree with both Eru and Jn, so its not just you. But I also disagree with both of them.

I agree with Eru that the rule against revealing information in the Invite forum is just as unenforceable as a rule against revealing information elsewhere would be. But I also agree with Jn that there is more of a justification for such a rule in the Invite forum because by definition people need to give their honest opinion of potential invitees. However, I disagree with Jn (and presumably Eru as well) in that my conclusion is that it would be better not to have a rule against revealing information even in the invite forum. That is because it is my opinion (based on my experience) that people who would be likely to do an act that is against an unenforceable rule are made more likely to do the rule-breaking act if the rule exists then if the rule doesn't exist. As such, unenforceable rules are self-defeating.

Yes, V., there's always that one person who is a maverick and a danger to us all.

Seriously, though, there is something to this. There are people who are by nature gate-breakers, and the fewer gates you put up the less likely they are to break them.

Jn

If you will forgive a newcomer breaking into this discussion...

The Font of Wisdom AKA Jnyusa wrote:

There are people who are by nature gate-breakers, and the fewer gates you put up the less likely they are to break them.

That is true enough. Locks exist to keep out honest people (said Frelga who had to break down an apartment door at least twice in her life). However, it is also true that in the absense of rules some people will make choices that they believe are perfectly good and virtuous but which could have disastrous consequences.

Personally, I feel that the best solution is to yes, have a rule - a very clear rule, but also explain the reason behind the rule in terms that appeal to people's better nature. ("All discussion in Invites forum is private. That includes sharing the general gist of conversation in the hopes of helping the invitee to fit better into this group or mend his/her ways. We ask you to keep it this way, to avoid a)hurting the feelings of inviteee (or non-invitee) and b) pissing off members who contributed to the discussion.")

Anyway, that's what seems to work best on my 6 year old.

Ahh, I think six year olds are people I can communicate with.

Having an explanation behind a rule is very very cool. Puts people at ease, and makes them feel like they're doing the board a courtesy. People like that.

FRELGA IS WISE.

I agree with what Rodia said in the past two pages, even if she's still confused about what it was. Made sense to me.

I haven't read this whole thread, but I agree with Frelga

What Frelga said. Make a clear rule with a clear explanation.

This board may have been fully confidential in the very beginning, when it was a meeting place for 30-40 people who knew each other quite well. But, even at the point I joined, it was grown to a community of more than 100 members, half of whom were virtually unknown to me. So, even if it still is a closed board, and I feel that I can talk about some things more freely than on most other boards, I would never say anything here that I wouldn't want anyone outside the community to read. And, that's an advice I would give everyone on this board, founder member and newcomer alike.

Iavas_Saar wrote:

I would say that as long as it's not causing a disruption to members of this board we should be able to say whatever we like. But obviously that's just me.

Well I found out recently that actually I do feel kinda bad about us talking about certain people who aren't invited here. It's causing me disruption, so you (plural) shouldn't be allowed to say anything like that anymore.

I think the idea of having a clear rule with a clear explanation is a good idea, and then people will know why that rule is there - but if someone wants to go ahead and break the rule then it's going to happen.

Rodia wrote:

I think that a rule about being polite and avoiding hurting people's feelings or trying to prove that people who can't come and defend themselves here are bad would do wonders to help us keep up a standard. In theory it should be a common expectation, but as a rule it would strengthen people's hearts, and give off a good impression on newcomers.

You know what - I thought we already had that as a guideline, since way back…

Quote:

"Each member of Board 77 shall endeavour to present a courteous attitude to all they encounter both on and off the boards, to treat fellow posters as human beings, show respect for individual sensibilities, and to support fellow members in both posting and creative efforts."

As I read it, ‘maintaining a courteous attitude’ encompassed ‘not slagging off someone else’. The ‘trouble’ is that right now we have no way of enforcing such a statement beyond an individual’s personal sense of honour and the inclination of other members to sit hard on someone who is being disrespectful.



I think it’s pretty clear by now (there’s always a thread running on the subject) that a closed board does not a happy community make. The fact is that work is happening to make this place viable as a more open community. It just can’t happen yesterday or even tomorrow.

Thanks Leoba. I missed that, I guess. Not hard to do, I haven't exactly been keeping up with everything.

I am guessing this is kind of a moot point now?

I feel a poll coming on...

A poll! A poll! My kingdom for a poll.

Poll done. http://www.phpbber.com/phpbb/viewtopic. ... rd77#51231

Thanks yov