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PostPosted: Thu 20 Jan , 2011 4:24 pm 
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TheMary wrote:
It sucks that it's socially acceptable for men to be fat and ugly and it's not for women.


Well, if women actually want to be as shallow as men, they can.

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PostPosted: Fri 21 Jan , 2011 12:52 am 
bioalchemist
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Estel, it definitely happened at my high school and junior high. In fact, in junior high, I kind of caught the edge of it - I physically resembled a girl who was supposedly a total slut and every now and then I got what was directed at her. At the time, I didn't understand what was going on and was rather confused. I didn't spend any time alone with boys and I wore baggy shirts over blue jeans. In HS, the slut-shaming was something I occasionally witnessed but since the targets looked nothing like me, I didn't catch any misdirected fire. The girls who got so tagged tended to show a lot of skin and wear a lot of make-up. They also apparently went all the way with every guy they dated, or some such. Some were actually part of the in-crowd. Others were total outcasts. It was usually the girls throwing that label around. When directed at an outcast, it was meant to bully and further stomp her down. When directed at a high-status girl, it was either venting resentment or an attempt to knock her down a few pegs in the pecking order.

There were also, apparently, some girls at my college who had the slut tag fixed to them. I'm not sure I ever met them, but my ex-boyfriend's roommate spent roughly the first 2/3 of freshman year chasing "sluts" and my ex described one of his conquests as "whorish". This roommate found someone he genuinely cared about towards the end of the year and, when we all graduated eight years ago, was with her still. I have no idea what it was about that girl that made her slutty - my ex did point her out in the crowd to me once. She was wearing a pretty normal outfit for a co-ed in an upstate NY winter and she struck me as a bit lonely. She probably was too. It was still early in freshman year when I saw her and friendships are pretty fluid at that stage. She'd likely made the mistake of getting physical intimacy confused with emotional intimacy, or she just liked sex, and as a result she won herself a reputation for being an easy, no strings attached lay. Except apparently she later flipped her lid at my ex's roommate because he never called her back (this was a report from the roommate when he came home while I was over one evening).

In hindsight, I got to wonder where someone as utterly sexually dysfunctional as that ex got off judging that girl. In hindsight, that was probably a red flag about his character. Man, I was dumb back then...

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PostPosted: Wed 26 Jan , 2011 2:48 am 
I've cried a thousand oceans, and I would cry a thousand more if that's what it takes to sail you home.

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Another guilt-sneak post here, but I gotta get these links down. :oops:

Jury Decides Consent Is Not Required For Girls Gone Wild

A jury ruled yesterday against a woman who claimed her reputation was damaged after she was featured on a "Girls Gone Wild" video. What makes this case remarkable is that she didn't expose her own breasts - she was assaulted. Jane Doe, was dancing when someone reached up and pulled her tank top down, exposing her breasts to the camera.

The jury foreman explained later to reporters that they figured if she was willing to dance in front of the photographer, she was probably cool with having her breasts on film. They said she gave implicit consent by being at the bar, and by participating in the filming - though she never signed a consent form, and she can be heard on camera saying "no, no" when asked to show her breasts.





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PostPosted: Wed 26 Jan , 2011 2:52 am 
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Well, she should appeal. :(

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PostPosted: Wed 26 Jan , 2011 3:23 am 
I've cried a thousand oceans, and I would cry a thousand more if that's what it takes to sail you home.

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It was from the summer; maybe she did.

Not that victim-blaming should exist in the first place.

EDIT: a new trial was ordered in November. How does this stuff work? If multiple trials are an option in the first place, how do the guilty ever stay in jail? :scratch: How do the innocent ever get justice? Just keep swimming?




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PostPosted: Wed 26 Jan , 2011 4:09 am 
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WTF?????


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PostPosted: Wed 26 Jan , 2011 5:12 am 
Kill the headlights and put it in neutral
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That makes my blood boil. I can't even come up with a coherent response. :( :rage:


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PostPosted: Wed 26 Jan , 2011 7:37 pm 
bioalchemist
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Well, I'm glad someone in the Missouri court system has a lick of sense. :roll:

*E*, if it can be shown that a previous trial was deeply fucked up, a new one may be ordered.

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PostPosted: Thu 27 Jan , 2011 12:19 am 
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I have a response.

There is such a thing as being out of harms way. Dancing in a bar where they are filming a Girls Gone Wild film, is in harms way. Especially if you don't want to be exposed. Does that make her guilty? Hell no. It did make her in harms way though. She shouldn't have had any part in that, but people do things that leave them exposed (no pun intended).

Having said that, the person that touched her should have been charged with assault and hung by the short hairs. Because she chose to dance in that atmosphere and to remain in harms way is in no way an excuse for assault. Selling a video of an assault has to be illegal. It just has to be or I am moving.

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PostPosted: Thu 27 Jan , 2011 7:06 am 
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True story: Girls Gone Wild came to Boulder because they heard the place is crawling with hot young coeds. That's true, but their effort to film was a total bust because, while the girls are hot, they don't want to be exploited for it. I was actually kind of proud of Boulder for that one.

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PostPosted: Thu 27 Jan , 2011 12:14 pm 
I've cried a thousand oceans, and I would cry a thousand more if that's what it takes to sail you home.

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Holby, I'm glad you think it doesn't make her guilty, but I can't get behind calling that location harmful. Perhaps especially because a guy wouldn't have to look at it the same way. There is probably more to be aware of when going to a club at night than, say, a mall in the afternoon, just because it's an ultra social environment that involves alcohol. But endangerment? May as well add 'leaving your own house' to the list. :( People don't always need to find themselves in a dark alley, empty parking lot, or other obviously undesirable locations, and so I'd hate to include what is usually a popular business establishment that people happily get involved with. Unless it's called Mike's House of Rape and Humiliation, the worst anyone should suspect is over-priced drinks and third world bathrooms.

Not to ignore the Girls Gone Wild part of your equation! I just don't know explicit production details. What I have heard is that patrons basically show up and then find out GGW is filming, so they can either carry on as normal or find another bar. There doesn't seem to be extensive advertising like if an actual movie was being filmed and needed extras. I think even the Westboro guys give more notification when they come to town. :P On another site, I read comments that kept referring to GGW as a porno shoot, so the girl was asking for trouble by sticking around. The thing is, if it were a porn shoot, ( :roll: ) that means you already have actors and the dirty stuff is there to see. The rest of the crew has their own jobs. It's not like the boom mic operator is getting fondled off-screen by the script supervisor or anything. GGW seems to be some guys with cameras walking around asking ladies if they want to participate, and then giving free t-shirts to those who do. It's closer to a news broadcast than a porno, and in both cases, I'm pretty sure consent is required if they aren't gonna blur anyone out. Except apparently when dancing or cleavage-baring is involved, in which case all forms of debauchery that escalate from there are totally okay.

The person who pulled the girl's shirt down ended up being female, which admittedly made me less steamed, but changes nothing about the inappropriateness of keeping it on the videotape or the fact that she friggin' said 'no'.

Riverthalos wrote:
*E*, if it can be shown that a previous trial was deeply fucked up, a new one may be ordered.

I understand that in general, but it does make me wonder how this one was presented, or if it mostly boiled down to an idiotic jury. :uhoh: How many other people have gotten screwed over for those precise reasons? Was "dancing for the camera" and "knowing what she was doing" used as evidence of her consent? Did Jane Doe's lawyer not call bullshit on that one?


For a bit of comparison, anyone hear about this new viral video featuring a woman falling into a fountain while texting?



I don't know how it got from the security tapes to national news, but both women had similar experiences otherwise imo. Allowing oneself to be distracted by a cell phone? Not so smart. Though you'd probably think the consequences were stubbing a toe or running into somebody, as opposed to crashing your car or falling off a roof (being extreme examples). Did she know there was a fountain in the building? Did Jane Doe eventually know Girls Gone Wild were filming at the bar? Yes, but neither deserved to fall, or get their chest exposed. Their only real lapses in judgment were texting and drinking, respectively, which hindered their reaction time when faced with that ledge, or that camera. :P GGW is profiting from Jane's humiliation whereas the only victim in fountain girl's case is her pride, but it is the former I have all sympathy for. The latter's court case is at least about why security did not arrive to help, as opposed to suing the mall in general, but I still place all blame on her actions and it has nothing to do with her gender. She was being stupid. Jane Doe, perhaps, was just being naive.




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PostPosted: Thu 27 Jan , 2011 9:03 pm 
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The location may not have been harmful, but apparently the situation was. A rowdy bar where they serve booze and are filming GGW has the potential for things to go awry. That doesn't mean she shouldn't have been able to go there and be safe, but the situation is less safe.

An analogy maybe. Pedestrians have the right of way in a crosswalk, yet I am not going to put myself in a situation where I have to trust that the oncoming car is going to stop. I should be able to safely cross the street without having to worry, but that isn't practical. It doesn't do me any good to be dead right, (emphasis on dead) and find myself crunched under someone's car.

Common sense and good decision making tends to keep people safer.

And again I think that the woman and the filmmakers should be held liable. She said no. End of story.

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PostPosted: Thu 27 Jan , 2011 9:18 pm 
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The woman who fell into the fountain was apparently texting to a friend and bragging about the stuff she just shoplifted.

I can't see that the mall has any liability at all, whether she's a thief or not. For the luvva pete, if you're dumb enough to walk around texting instead of paying attention to your own feet? It's nuts to claim anyone's at fault but her.

The girl in the bar, however, should sue for trillions.

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PostPosted: Thu 27 Jan , 2011 11:23 pm 
I took the stars from my eyes, and then I made a map, And knew that somehow I could find my way back; Then I heard your heart beating, you were in the darkness too - So I stayed in the darkness with you
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That's bullshit! I went been to Panama City Beach Florida where GGW was filming during my senior year of college for spring break. Should I have stayed inside because they were filming to keep myself out of harms way? Um....no. This is all about who you surround yourself with and how you want to be percieved. I went the entire week drunk without flashing my boobs to a single camera. You know why? I have excellent friends. It's unfortuante that that girl didn't have excellent friends, but to say that she bascially got what she deserved? That irks me. Good thing she wasn't raped because she might have "deserved" that too. We should just stay in our homes because leaving the house inevitably puts us, you know where, in harms way.

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