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Crazy things we do in our sleep

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Eruname
Post subject: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 9:44 pm
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A person at an American Expat board I visit started a thread with this title and I've had a good deal of laughs at the replies it's gotten. It's pretty amazing to see how weird people can be when they aren't fully awake. Some exerpts:
Quote:
I occasionally sit bolt upright in bed and say something cryptic and possibly prophetic like "The purple moon is coming and all the elephants will swim!" and then lay back down and go back to sleep.

When the kids were all little babies and had woken up in the night I usually brought them into bed with me. If they started to cry and woke me I frequently would have bizarre thoughts like "He's just worried about the stock market losing value" or other really weird things.

And of course one of my favorites- when my oldest was a few months old and woke up at 2am I was so out of it that after getting him out of bed and settling him in his swing I went into the kitchen and made him a sandwich. Turkey, ham, cheese, the works. For a 3 month old baby.

It's a damn good thing I don't sleepwalk, though there have been weird occasions where I fall asleep on the couch and wake up in the bedroom (ok, lots of people do that) but there have also been occasions where I go to bed in pajamas and wake up a few hours later fully dressed, (in different clothes than I wore that day, and inside out or with only one arm or leg through!) with the lights burning. It's really disconcerting and thankfully that hasn't happened in years.
Quote:
My sister talks in her sleep. We shared a bedroom growing up and one night she sat up, pumped a fist in the air and yelled 'USA!!!'. Then she went back to sleep. She also confused our rug for the bathroom and peed on it a few times.
:LMAO:
Quote:
I love it when I wake up laughing! It puts a smile on my face for the whole day. Like a year ago I had a dream that I was really really mad at someone (can't remember who) and I called her...wait for it...a "doodle bitch"! Oh my God! What the hell? LOL I'm almost crying with laughter just thinking about it! Anyway, I woke myself up laughing and it cracked me up all day long.
:damnfunny:
Quote:
Another time, and sadly I can't blame it on being a child, I was dreaming that I was in a castle and came upon a long corridor with a door at the far end. I slowly made my way down the corridor, and I remember torches on the walls were lighting the way. When I got to the door, I opened it to find a lone toilet sitting there. I went in and sat down....needless to say, I did what one would normally do on a toilet. Unfortunately, I was in bed....
:Q :rofl:

So I'm curious what sorts of weird things anyone does here!

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GandalfStormcrow
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 10:14 pm
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Once, while in Nags Head NC, I woke up in pitch darkness. I was a sleepwalker at the time. Being 800 or so miles away from home on a trip with my friend and his family and being about 13 years old, I was terrified. I started to think back through where all we'd been that day, one place being the pier. I figured it wouldn't be SO dark if I were out on the pier due to the moon and stars, but disoriented due to the total darkness I decided to just stand still.

I finally got brave enough to start walking around a bit and found something to sit on. I took a few deep breaths, got up and slowly walked forward. Finding a doorknob, I opened the door to find myself in the OTHER family's bathroom. It was a duplex condo right on the beach, and we had only rented the one half.

I have no idea what compelled me in my sleep to walk into the other folks' bathroom, shut myself in and wake up standing up. It kind of sucked. lol

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MariaHobbit
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 10:28 pm
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I don't have any funny stories like those. I'm such a light sleeper that I almost always snap wide awake at the slightest unusual noise. I've even woken myself up with a snore before. I'm pretty sure it was a single snore/snort, because the memory of it was still echoing in my head as I figured out what it was that had woken me.

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*E*V*E*N*S*T*A*R*
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 10:31 pm
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Some of those stories sounded really familiar, Eru, I wonder if they were screencapped and posted elsewhere or something haha.

Nothing interesting for me. I used to wet the bed because I was fucking lazy. :roll: I snore, and laugh constantly. Probably thinking about random jokes I read online throughout the day, or out of embarrassment for whatever actor I was picturing naked. *thumbs up*

Hard to get much of a report there until you've had roommates!

My dog chases bunny rabbits in her sleep, though. Lies on her side with all four legs going crazy. Entertaining. I will keep an ear open for Freudian slips in semi-conscious humans from now on. ;)

EDIT: here's a bit of a better story. Couple years back, I discovered that a book I owned glowed in the dark. How did I find out? Fell asleep reading it and later on that night, turned over in bed to open my eyes and see this: link. Nearly had a non-lazy accident. Damn you, Palahniuk!!!




*E*

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theduffster
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 10:38 pm
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Rebecca used to walk in her sleep. She talked in her sleep, but the sleepwalking scared us badly. She'd had an accident when skiing when she was about 11 or so, and the doctors told us she was fine, but she if she started doing anything like sleepwalking, bring her in for more evaluation.

So, she sleepwalked, (sleptwalked?) and we took her in. The doctors wanted her to have an EEG for 24 hours. That meant hooking all kinds of little electrodes to her scalp, running down to a monitor that she had to have strapped to herself. I remember she didn't want to go to school with that getup, and I let her stay home. I wanted to run some errands and she wanted to come with me. I didn't think she'd want people staring at her electrodes, so I suggested she wear a cap. She chose a cap that had a little propeller on top. No, nobody stared at her at all. :LMAO:

Anyhow, we waited for results, and the nurse called to give us the results, but said she couldn't tell us herself, the doctor wanted to give them to us personally, and we had to come in to the office for them...and we had to make an appointment to discuss the results.

We were so terrified. The doctor droned about REM movements, and other gobbeldy gook that boiled down to...Rebecca is a really heavy sleeper. Really. Such a heavy sleeper that she sleepwalks. That's all it was. :cheers:

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ToshoftheWuffingas
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 10:55 pm
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Quote:
I didn't think she'd want people staring at her electrodes, so I suggested she wear a cap. She chose a cap that had a little propeller on top.
OMG you have to love someone like that. :D

Not a real story unfortunately but Tubby Kaye had this yarn about a man staying over after a celebrity's party. He dreamt he had got up in the night and discovered they were so rich they had a golden toilet.
He told his hostess in the morning about his dream.
She called out to her husband,
' Howie, I just found out who blocked the tuba.'

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Rebecca
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 10:55 pm
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Hey! Umm..... theduffster snores! :uhoh:

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*E*V*E*N*S*T*A*R*
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:02 pm
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And also talks in her sleep but I canneh remember what she said anymore. :P




*E*

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Holbytla
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:03 pm
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ToshoftheWuffingas wrote:
Quote:
I didn't think she'd want people staring at her electrodes, so I suggested she wear a cap. She chose a cap that had a little propeller on top.
OMG you have to love someone like that. :D
Indeed.

I almost peed on my brother while he was sleeping once.
I guess I was maybe 6 or 8 and I thought I had walked to the bathroom when I was actually standing next to his bed and well whipped it out. :D My mother stopped me in time though. Luckily for me.

I am also accused of falling asleep on the couch once during the Miss America pageant and wilding applauding for the winner while sleeping.

I don't believe none of them. When I sleep, I just sleep. That is all.

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Rebecca
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:05 pm
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My family went camping a lot. Once I tried to walk (while sleeping of course :P ) out of our camper but my dad stopped me in time. Another time, while sleeping in a tent my little sister said "Do I have to?" and I responded with "Yes Ellie"...while both of us were sleeping. :D

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Pippin4242
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:17 pm
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My girlfriend speaks in tongues. Occasionally she also comes out with gems in English, such as "Link won't do it... his sword won't let him," and then there was the time that she hit me, and said "NO." I was really worried until I found out she was asleep. And then, on a different occasion, with varying degrees of annoyance and worry... "No... let me do it... no, let me... no, no, no, no, no, no, no..." I sense a theme. :P

I don't know about what I do in my sleep so much (I'm a heavy sleeper) but I have been accused of coming out with some interesting things just before I fall asleep. The worst are the times when I catch myself doing it and then try and deny it.
"I don't get why the flowerpots are blue... and they have blue on the French flag."
"You know those stamps they give out with manga? I wish you could change them for kittens."
When I worked in WH Smiths I caught myself on the verge of offering my girlfriend a plastic bag nearly every week. :doh1:

My brother once turned round in his sleep and whimpered "I can't do it... it's too small," to my continuing amusement. :P

The very best, however, is a mutual friend of myself and my girlfriend, who, chastely sharing a single bed with us one time (:P), rolled out one morning onto the floor, but didn't wake up. My girlfriend, being a kind person, decided to tell her, even though I tried to make her just go back to sleep (what? She was next to me. She was warm).
"Hey. Katy. You fell out of bed."
"Nrrrgh?"
"You fell out of bed."
"No I didn't."
"Katy, you fell out of bed."
"What?" (Hurt and confused) "You pushed me!"

-Pips-

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Estel
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:49 pm
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At the Philly m00t I did something in my sleep, but I can only talk about it in ToE.

Apparently, Steve really liked it though :halo:


Last night I almost threw up in my sleep. I had a dream that my landlady tried to unclog a toilet and instead it exploded everywhere. The dream was so vivid I could actually smell it, and I woke up because I literally had to stop myself from throwing up in real life.



As for sleepwalking - I did it a lot when I was little. Every single morning for months my parents would find me asleep outside on the little bridge that crossed the ditch between our sidewalk and the road. They even tried locking me in my room, but I still managed to find a way to get out. Luckily, the island we lived on was so small that the only cars allowed were government vehicles, so the road wasn't a worry. Plus, it was a military base, so there was no way I could've been kidnapped and taken off the island if anyone was so inclined. Even so, must have been scary for my poor parents. "Oh, where's Jen?.... - Asleep in the road again dear."

Last edited by Estel on Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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theduffster
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:53 pm
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Yeah, we all knew where Rebecca got her sleepwalking tendencies from. :whistle: Her dad is a very very light sleeper.

(off to TOE forum for the Estel story)

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Estel
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Fri 27 Feb , 2009 11:58 pm
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I said ToE was the only place I could post about it... that's not saying I'm going to ;) :Q :oops: :blackeye: :help: ;)


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GandalfStormcrow
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Sat 28 Feb , 2009 12:55 am
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Estel wrote:
I said ToE was the only place I could post about it... that's not saying I'm going to ;) :Q :oops: :blackeye: :help: ;)
Unfaaaaaaaaaair!!!!! lol

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Amrunelen
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Sat 28 Feb , 2009 1:55 am
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Oh come on....you can't say something cryptic like that and then not continue. :P A few thoughts came to mind, but I'll never know! (do I want to admit that my mind actually went through pondering what you could've meant? :LMAO: )

I don't do anything especially interesting, though apparently my snore has been mistaken for a vibrating cellphone by a few people. :P And I moan a lot in my sleep when I have a nasty cold. My mom accused me of singing in my sleep one morning, but since she couldn't produce lyrics or a tune I don't know if I believe her. :P

My roomate, on the other hand....well, she doesn't talk a lot, but on a rare occasion. The best was one morning when I had an earlier class though, just about to leave the bedroom, and her alarm's going off for the third or fourth time (excessive snooze button user). As I'm walking by her, she says "I don't know why it's doing that." *semi-whimpering whiny voice* What?, I ask. "I don't know why it's doing that." It's your alarm clock, Melissa. You set it and you keep pressing the snooze button. But I have to leave now.....annnd I just leave. :P

One night there were the short and well spaced out proclamations of "Grandma?" "No!"

Ah, and another of my favorites.... I'm staying up late one night, probably posting on the forums. Only light from the laptop. She flings her covers back and sits bolt upright, "I feel weird." Lays back down again, recovers, and continues along sleeping. :damnfunny:

My dad has entire conversations in his sleep now....most likely from the assortment of medications he's on. One of the greatest soundbytes I can recall at the moment though is, "Shame on you farting in church." :LMAO:

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MaidenOfTheShieldarm
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Sat 28 Feb , 2009 6:03 am
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Excellent thread idea, Eru. The first one you posted was particularly amusing.

This apparently happened when I was little:

Me: *sits bolt upright* What colour is the air?
My Mother: It's . . . blue?
Me: No, it's pink.

And then I lay down and remained asleep.

Freshman year I apparently had a long argument with my roommate over whether or not I was going to class that morning. I did not go to class, and to this day I still don't recall that happening.

My favourite story, though, is actually about my great grandfather, Sam, who was a kosher butcher and, shall we say, not exactly rich. One night my great grandmother woke up and he wasn't there, so she went looking for him. She found him sitting on the porch, apparently wide awake and dressed in his best suit. "Sam," she said, "what are you doing out here?" He replied: "I'm waiting for limo."

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Rodia
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Sat 28 Feb , 2009 10:16 am
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I often wake up crying.

:bawl:


Ahem. No, really. On the ship, I would wake up every single time I went to bed, turned around in my bunk in a blind panic and convinced that I was stuck in some kind of shaft on the Nostromo. But that's the bunk's fault.

At home...when I was a teenager I went through a week or two of waking up running down the corridor. I'd wake up just in time to crash into the wall, wonder wtf and go back to bed. :P

Nowadays I kind of hate sleeping. It's just not fun anymore. Unfortunately I don't have insomnia so I get tired and have to sleep. Yeah, I know, I bet if I did have insomnia I would hate it, too.

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Jonny
Post subject: Re: Crazy things we do in our sleep
Posted: Sun 08 Mar , 2009 5:59 pm
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When I was a kid I used to sleepwalk really bad. It was really bad when we went to hotels and I would be found in various random places in the building. Eventually my parents had to barricade the hotel room door closed every night. :D

My mom sleepwalks in a different way... she gets really distressed, she'd be awake but still dreaming. It always had to do with protecting me and my sisters. She'd be so upset, convinced that something really surreal and creepy was going on, and then BAM she'd wake up out of it.

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