Argh, I'm so angry with myself. I've been lazy this summer and therefore my dog hasn't been getting much exercise either. Well, I made enough pocket moneys to get a bicycle yesterday, my first in er maybe fifteen years or some awful number like that. I knew enough to not try biking while holding the dog's leash haha, but apparently just letting her run free in the backyard while maneuvering the bumpy terrain alongside her wasn't too bright either. Once I had to turn around, I didn't have enough energy to keep pedaling even slightly uphill, but my legs are just a bit too short to have both feet on the ground, and as fate would have it, I stopped right on an incline.
Okay, so I fall, big deal. I did it a few weeks ago on a swingset anyway lol. For some reason, falling is much different with a heavy-ass bike on top of you and gears slicing through your skin. Who'da thunk.
It's funny because even as I was falling over, I was already planning a trip to the hospital just to make sure I wasn't too fudged up. Yet once I was actually on the ground (which didn't hurt btw), that was like the end of rational thought, because I just wanted the bike off me. I'm not sure if I was already cut at that point, or if I made things worse by scrambling to kick the bike away, but by the time I did look at my calf, ngl... my insides were on the outside. I feel barfy just thinking about it.
I could walk just fine, I mean the wound was sore but nothing crazy. I wondered if it was one of those situations where people don't realize they've been shot, or are holding their intestines and don't feel a thing. For the record, I only started crying out of disappointment that I had fucked up the bike situation so quickly.
Also, it looked soooo disgusting. I figured the docs would end up sticking a needle in there for some reason or another, which made me cry more in between cursing my idiocy. Man, I never used to have problems with that stuff. Might even be why I did get into horror flicks, it just never phased me. I wasn't a kid who was scared of doctor appointments or visiting the dentist. But in recent years? Oy. I have a ways to fall yet, I suppose, but I'm just not used to feeling squicky about anything, so this blows. All that beige tissue... ugh, like I don't have enough problems inventing meals, there's no way I'm going near raw chicken for a while so idk what I'm gonna cook with.
While I was going cross-eyed at the doc stitching me up, all I could think of was bullshit island surgery on that show Lost and thinking, "fuck you Sawyer, pulling a bullet out with your bare fingers. Fuck! You!!" Also that stupid bitch from Twilight, all 'tee-hee I'm endearingly klutzy and always in bandages, but no biggie, I'm not phased by anything unless a hot guy is ignoring me.' If today became at all regular, I'd just buy a big bubble to live in, okay. Injuries are lame!
Bah. I'm just pissed. My brothers are morons and always hurting themselves, but this is new for me. I wasn't too wimpy a child, but I think scratches and pulled muscles were the worst of it. I've always been clumsy and had blonde moments, but so far have only paid for that in stubbed toes, sunburns, and ruined cooking attempts.
No stitches until now. And it was only a month ago that I was in the hospital again for an ear ache I got from sticking in a q-tip too far. Lmfao.
Maybe it's just one of those summers, or my intelligence peaked at 24. Ugh.
Anyway, I'm all bandaged up now and only missing a wee bit of tissue. It wasn't impressive-looking enough for me to ask to keep it. If I can look at the scar next week without vomiting, maybe I'll take a picture. Until then, I can't go swimming
and will probs stay off the bike until I'm used to stretching the gauze a bit. It's not a cast or anything, but hey, when you got a bandage on you sort of automatically stiffen up. Plus my ~ego~ is damaged, I should probably hurry up and get a
"Christine" license plate before I feel worse.
Bike: 1, *E*: 0
For now.
EDIT: in case you couldn't tell, share stories about your own battle wounds or post funny macros about how I fail at life.
*E*