All right! I've counted the votes, weighed everything carefully (some of you came up a little light on the chocolate), considered, meditated, pondered, took a nap, had a beer, watched some decorating shows, and have finally run out of excuses.
It's time for the official results of b77's first Mayoral election.
I first want to thank President and Mrs. Carter for their thorough supervision of the balloting process, and it was really generous of you to leave almost half the tub of Red Vines.
Okay, there was some confusion about the ballot (God knows how—good Lord, people!), so I must first report some, er, odd votes.
- In last place was a single vote "for Eru" that was PMed to the wrong place and did not include any candy, or so T.E.D. reported while licking his fingers. Boo.
In the penultimate position was three different spellings of Eruname with accents in three different places.
In the antepenultimate position was six different spellings of Eruname, because I give points for style.
In sixth place, with 1 vote, was "F. Erunáme, because Erunáme is better than donuts!" The sacred principle of secrecy compels me not to even hint whose vote this was.
In fifth place, with zero votes (Faramond, go complain to President Carter—he just left with the other half of the Red Vines, dammit), was "D. Erunáme, because I’m afraid of what Iavas will do to me if I don’t vote for her." Apparently no one is afraid of Iavas.
In fourth place, with 1 vote, was "B. Erunáme, because she has selflessly stepped forward and volunteered to run for the job." Ooo, I forgot to vote. Make that 2 votes.
In third place, with 4 votes, and it was tied for second in number of votes but not in weight of candy—the Dove bar did it—was "A. Erunáme, because she is a dedicated b77 member who has contributed greatly to the development of this forum and will be a careful and responsible Mayor." I guess it was too obvious.
In second place, also with 4 votes but a Dove bar in the lead, was "E. Erunáme, because Iavas will look so cute pouring tea and cutting ribbons at all the boardwide events." Wow, Iavas, that was close. Thanks for the Whitman Sampler.
And—the winning ballot option, with 6 votes, was:
"C. Erunáme, because she looks an awful lot like Arwen."
I'd like to thank everyone who thought to send chocolate—oh, and Mr. Prim thanks the anonymous donor for the fifth of Laphroaig—and all the little people who made this possible. My sincere congratulations to Eru—I hope she'll have as much fun with this job as I've had, and I'm sorry for the condition of the files, neatness is just not my forté, y'know? And sorry about the wrappers everywhere. Counting the votes was pretty grueling. We ran out of cocoa in Hour Three and Rosalynn got cranky.
Good night, all.
Primula Baggins
Honorary, Temporary, Lame Duck Mayor of b77