Most of the HOAs in our area have no community facilities or events like classes, just a committee to keep their neighbors in line. Practically every little collection of streets has an HOA established by whatever company developed that property.
I've lived in 2 developments with HOAs and found that the bylaws were moderately useless in predicting which ones would be OK. We avoided anything with picky clauses ("paint must be of a color approved by the current committee...") but found that even when the rules look OK, it all depends on who's running the HOA committee.
The first one was a nightmare and constant source of stress, where the actual rules ended up being whatever the long-time residents (AKA "old conservative guys") wanted. We never knew when we'd run afoul of some unwritten nitpicky rule. We've never had a run-in or notice from the second one, though I do know of some people who regularly get "weed your garden" letters from the powers-that-be.
I much preferred living in town, where the same regulations apply to everyone and you know where you stand.
Regardless, if you buy in one, you can't just ignore the bylaws and pretend it's your little house on the prairie.
Actually, some people do just that and seem to live happily enough in them. They claim it's easier to ask for forgiveness than to ask permission all the time and seem unfazed by getting HOA notices.