board77

I'm another one of those who now realizes I was incredibly stupid to think that I was fat back in junior high/ high school. I wasn't rail thin, but just normal and healthy looking. Yet I always told myself how fat and ugly I was and that's why guys didn't like me. Looking back I realize it was my attitude. I was shy, always stood in the corner with my arms folded, wouldn't ever try anything new, and complained a lot.

Of course now I'm overweight and wish I could have that old body back. Though the reason why I'm not attractive really is because I don't believe myself to be. I just can't and probably never will. Really a lot of it does boil down to attitude. There are plenty of large women out there who think they're sexy as hell and guess what? They are. I just wish I could have that self confidence. I don't know where to get it from.

Estel wrote:

I may be trying to loose weight, but I don't want to be thin by any means It's so ironic - there's this commercial on TV with this chica saying "I've gone from a size 10 to a size 4 and I've never been happier about my body" I consider a size 4 to be to thin for myself. Some women are that skinny naturally - fast metabolism and all that. However, my goal is a size 10 - the size she was so happy about not being anymore

I'd say my goal size is a 14. A 12 would be stretching it. I'd be pretty thin for that. A 14 sounds huge, but for me it wouldn't be. I'm 5'11" and a mesomorph so there's no way in hell I'll ever be a size 4. My bones are too big! Right now I'm midway between 16 and 18....though honestly probably closer to 18.

Quote:

Eru - definitely a D cup, no bigger, and only that big at that time of the month. Otherwise I hover between a C and a D. Weirdest thing is, you remember I posted a little over a month ago that I had gone down to a size 14? Well, I was so happy with myself, that I decided to take a few days off from working out. That's resulted in only working out twice in the past month Cannot take breaks dammit! Anyway, I've gained all the weight back, but in a weird weird way. I'm down to a size 12-14 on my upper half, but I've gained a cup size and my lower half is up to a 16-18. I'm like a weird pear shape with tits

I wonder if you aren't really a bigger size. I saw an Oprah show that was all about how women wear bras that are too small for them. I'm wondering about myself now.

I've done the same thing as you....not exercized, though mine was related to mental issues. It sucks because I had lost fat off of my stomach and I gained it back. Also my legs are now bigger because I've put muscle on them but haven't lost fat there yet...that will be the last place. That's probably what's happened to you. The waist is where women can lose/add fat the quickest I believe. I'm also like you proportionally. My upper body has always been a smaller size than my lower body. Makes it hell to buy dresses!

Anyway,

As for my weight...I'm over 200 as well. Luckily I'm tall so it spreads out and I don't look so bad. According to the height and weight chart a woman of my height should weigh between 155-175. I'd be extremely lucky if I got down to 175. According to the chart I need to lose more than 30 pounds. I don't think I have that much fat! Plus as I get more fit I'll be building muscle which weighs more than fat. So I try not to become obsessed with the number but how my clothes fit.

As to what type of girl guys find attractive, I have a hard time believing they don't mind girls that have some meat on them. When they talk about curvy girls I think they're talking about the type of girl who will be on the cover of Maxim: huge boobs and tiny everywhere else. I NEVER see guys talking about how hot some normal sized girl is. I always see them gawking at the thin girl with huge boobs.

I always hate it when my guy friends comment on girls in front of me...especially when they're talking about how ugly a girl is...girls who look better than me. My self esteem plummets even further everytime.

Nin, you are NOT fat!!!! You're gorgeous and I wish I could wear a bathing suit and look good in it! You've even had two kids. You're doing great!

Sidonzo, I remember thinking when you had an avatar pic of yourself how pretty you are. You look so bright and happy. You exude cheerfulness.

My junior year of college I lived in an apartment with three other girls. At the time, I thought that all of them were ten times more atttractive than I. Now I look back at the pics and I wonder what the hell I was thinking. All three of them were between 100 and 108 pounds, the largest was a size 2, the other two were size 0. At the time, I was 130-135 and a size ten-twelve (probably a size 8-10 in the waist, but I've got big hips, so I had to go with bigger sizes). Next to them, I thought I was sooo fat. Now I realize that I actually had curves and was really pretty. I so regret my self-esteem at the time. If I had only realized that I was pretty....

a pic of me (on the left) and the "heaviest" of my roommates. I weighed more than 20 pounds more than her in this pic, though the coat kinda covers that up.





Eru - I got measured and everything. Am officially a D-cup. I was wearing a bra size to small for about two years probably. Never believed I could be larger than a C, but I guess my body to boob ratio confused me. They don't look bigger than a C cup, but that's probably because my body is larger as well. I just hope that when I get my weight down, the boobs will stay the same size As for the body - I've gotten myself under 200 again. Am down to 195 and hope it will go lower. I was 187 in the beginning of July, and had actually gotten lower than that. 180 seems to be my barrier though. I can work out every day, and not get lower than that without serious (and unhealthy) measures, that I am not willing to take.

If I see a thin woman with large boobs, I often go are those real!

I don't know how you gals classify curvy but most guys I know think curvy as Jennifer Lopez "curvy". Great boobs and ass, but not rail thin.

I think I discussed this at Torc, that I do not mind if you are a bit on the chubby side but please don't wear those very loose clothes that make you look like you didn't even bother looking at yourself in the mirror. I know a few women who are overweight but they can wear nice clothes like a tank or lingerie top, tight dresses and look as sexy as a supermodel. I think it's the way you carry yourself that shines through all the time.

How tall are you Estel?

Do you eat a lot of breads, pastas and sweets? That's what gets me. Whenever I focused on eating a protein with veggies and whole grains I did a lot better and that helped my fat loss. I'm back to eating sweets again though. They just taste so darn good. \

Lurker, I'd call Jennifer Lopez thin...especially now. She's thinner than when she first started out in show buisness. She's definately not what I call curvy. Curvy to me is Rene Zellweger as the Bridget Jones character.

Size 0? What is that? I think US sizes could not possibly be the same as Aus sizes.

Here, clothes for adult women begin at size 8 (very small; super-model skinny) and go up to size 18 as standard. A few (insane!) designers produce a size 6 for all those anorexics on the verge of death, but to get anything above size 18 you have to go to oversize shops. In fact, most department stores don't offer fashionable clothes above size 16.

Size 18 is the cutoff for "normal" sizes as well Imp...though some brands only go to 16. So I'm not sure how sizes differ. Fashionable plus size clothes has gotten better in the states, though they're expensive from what I've heard. I've not been able to fit into plus size stuff...yet. I'm not top heavy enough and I'm borderline on the bottom. I'm stuck in between really. I ABHOR shopping for clothes!

Eru, what struck me was Estel's reference to size 0 and size 2 - non-existent in Australia.

I'm a size 9 or 10 depending on cut, and sometimes get larger tops to accommodate my bust. When I was about 20 and weighed about 108 lb I wore size 8 - keep in mind I'm very small - only 5' 2" with a small build, and size 8 really is as small as an adult woman could be in Aus sizes.

So how small do you have to be to wear a size 2? Size 0? I'm thinking...you'd have to be transparent or 12 years old.

I think I might get the difference. Here sizes go up by increments of 2 so sizes are: 0, 2, 4, 6, 8, 10, 12, 14, 16, 18. Junior's sizes use the odd numbers. It seems in Australia the sizes go up by each number: 8, 9, 10, 11 etc?

Not to side track this into a discussion about garment sizes. - but no, we end to go up in increments of 2 as standard also; some garment manufacturers, especially of jeans, do in betweens in size 9 and 11 but never come across size 7 or 13 or 15 etc (maybe because I never asked?)

Kids' sizes another kettle of fish: size 0000 (teeny tiny newborn) 0 (standard newborn), 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 - then they go into adult sizes.

sorry Estel - won't wander into the garment industry again.

I never understood American sizes for women. I think they were explained to me once, but I don't remember. I always kind of thought they were done so as to make women feel better about themselves, but then I might be completely off-based.

TheEllipticalDisillusion wrote:

I never understood American sizes for women. I think they were explained to me once, but I don't remember. I always kind of thought they were done so as to make women feel better about themselves, but then I might be completely off-based.

Yeah, wearing a 34 might sound shocking for a woman, but it's something I can understand and use for myself when I go shopping for pants.

Now correct me if I'm wrong, but I've heard that different clothing manufacturers for women sometime use a slightly different size. i.e. a size 14 from Brand A could theoretically be bigger than a size 15 from brand B.

Lurker wrote:

I think I discussed this at Torc, that I do not mind if you are a bit on the chubby side but please don't wear those very loose clothes that make you look like you didn't even bother looking at yourself in the mirror. I know a few women who are overweight but they can wear nice clothes like a tank or lingerie top, tight dresses and look as sexy as a supermodel. I think it's the way you carry yourself that shines through all the time.

J-lo is a skinny girl with a big ass and average tits. When I say curvy, I don't mean a woman with a a butt and boobs and a completely flat tummy - that's a *good* figure, but not, in my mind, a curvy figure. I mean a woman with some meat on her thighs, a belly that bows out a bit, etc... I don't know how to explain it - I would show a pic, but when I do an image search, I just get porn pics and more skinny actresses.

edit: yeahEru! - like Renee Z in the first Bridget Jones. That's curvy.

The problem with finding non-loose clothes when you're a bigger woman, is that it is extremely difficult to find them. If I go to Nordstrom and spend $70 on a single item of clothing, then I can find non-loose clothing in my size that is somewhat pretty and somewhat flattering. If I want to spend a reasonable amount of money? Forget it. There's nothing but loose, flowing, "I'm the same age as my mother" type clothing. Overweight women don't wear unflattering, ugly clothes because we want to. We wear them because that is what is offered to us. If plus-sized women want to wear "nice clothes like a tank or lingerie top, tight dresses," we have to be willing to spend a LOT of money.

TED - if American sizes are meant to make women feel better about themselves, then anyone above a size 6 is screwed.

The difference between a US size 14 in the plus department vs. the "normal" department is huge. I have never seen anything larger than a 16 in a "normal" department, and even that is very rare. 14 is more common, but that can even be hard to find at times, and when I can find it, it never fits. It's more than a slight size difference between brands. It's huge - even within the same brand, but with a different line in that brand. Very frustrating.

Impy - 108 was the weight of my heaviest roommate, and she wore an American size 2.

I know I said I wouldn't talk sizes...but it reminds me when we were in Singapore and I didn't have enough clothes with me for that climate (ie extremely hot and humid - think sauna).

We went to a department store; I selected a few garments across the two different sizes that usually fit; well, they may have fit my daughter!

Obviously made to fit the average Singaporean woman, who is slighter than the average Aus/Caucasian.

Different cultures; different body shapes.

Women's clothing sizes in different countries

The German system is used in most European countries; but of course, France and Italy have to have their own...

According to that comparison, my European size 40 would correspond to American 12, British 14, and Australian 16.

You ever tried Lane Bryant Estel? I've been in there once and the prices weren't too bad. I just don't have big enough boobs to fit into those clothes.

Most stores I go to go up to size 18....plenty of 16s as well. I don't have a problem finding my size but I do have a problem with finding my size in a tall length. Apparently all tall people must be thin.

edit: I'm a 20 in Australia...apparenly a plus size.

Holy Carumbah! I'd have to take a chart with me to shop across the world.

I had no problems buying in Europe though; alot of Aus garments come with two sizes on them, both the Aus and standard European, so I have a better idea of the correlation.

The arbitrary nature of the way sizes are set is quite odd though; I don't see why a woman would feel better with a size 12 than with a size 40.

The psychology of clothes and shopping for them is interesting. Many stores are intimidating to walk into for me - they have this aura of 'specialness' which is almost a physical bar for me. I don't dare be seen in them, with all those 'beautiful' people and 'beautiful' clothes.

I prefer to shop somewhere without a sleek salesperson hovering about me, flattering me with her mouth into buying an item while her eyes clearly say "my God woman, what are you thinking?"

Shopping is such a fraught activity!

Impenitent wrote:

The psychology of clothes and shopping for them is interesting. Many stores are intimidating to walk into for me - they have this aura of 'specialness' which is almost a physical bar for me. I don't dare be seen in them, with all those 'beautiful' people and 'beautiful' clothes.

I totally agree. There are some stores I won't set foot in because I don't feel like I belong...like Banana Republic and Abercrombie.

Has anyone noticed the sizes changing over the years? I can fit into smaller sizes of my old clothes...like Old Navy...I can fit into a size 14 pair of shorts. But if I tried on Old Navy's current 14, I'd be lucky to get my leg in them.

Now I understand what curvy means to women, thanks Eru and Estel. My wife thinks Patricia Arquette (Medium series fame) is curvy. Bridget Jones is what I mean by chubby yet sexy.

Impenitent wrote:

I know I said I wouldn't talk sizes...but it reminds me when we were in Singapore and I didn't have enough clothes with me for that climate (ie extremely hot and humid - think sauna).

We went to a department store; I selected a few garments across the two different sizes that usually fit; well, they may have fit my daughter!

Obviously made to fit the average Singaporean woman, who is slighter than the average Aus/Caucasian.

Different cultures; different body shapes.

I know what you mean, Imp. My wife wears a medium in Canadian size which is a 6-8 so I bought her a chinese dress in a large size in Hong Kong and when she wore it, she got so upset because she could hardly fit in the dress. So what she did was take out the "tucks" the lines that usually makes the dress a little curvy (she knows how to sew) and still it just fits her. I told her she's an extra large in Asia and I don't think I saw one.

The style and the cut of a piece of clothing will determine how it fits and whether you need a size larger or not.

I like Eddie Bauer... I think one of my guy friends described the style quite aptly- 'fashionably utilitarian'. Trying on some of their clothing in the US last winter, I realized the cut was 'larger'. Normally I would 'think' I would wear a US 12 (mainly because of height- smaller sizes tend to be floodwater and sometimes the waist is pinched). But I had to buy size 10 and the waist was still wide. This is not because 'I' was skinny, but because the cut of the pants had a wider waist (everything else fit fine so I bought the pants).

As to the comment about curvier women wearing 'loose flowing' clothing. I believe fashion dictates this, and this is what you find in the catalogues (or as Estel put it- clothing your mother or grandmother would wear). But it is also determined by how 'comfortable' one feels having all their 'curves' showing. On special occasions something chic or sexy might do, but you don’t wear that to the grocery store. Be realistic- a thin person can get away with a grubby t-shirt and torn jeans, and this is NOT the same as ‘someone who didn’t bother to look in the mirror’?? A person wears what they are comfortable with.

I wear 40-42 European, so 12- 14 US I guess? although I can fit into some 38 clothes...but sizes do warry with age, true

because each country has a universal "standard" which is created by determining the average body measurements of the population and the clothing sizes are determined acording to that (basically, if Germans are in average taller than Italians, then that will refelct in their clothing sizes)...I would have to check to be sure, but I think the standard gets revised every 10 to 15 years...and the sizes can change depending on changes in population height and other similar measurements

hm, the heaviest I`ve been was 95kg...according to my height, my ideal weight should be 65kg, but I think I would have waaay too many bones sticking out at 65
I`m now 78, and would like to go down to 70...simply because well, now I consider myself to look darn good, but hell, I`m close to looking HOT so why not go for it I would never starve myself for looks though, I enjoy good cooking too much for that- and besides, good diet is all about thinking how much you eat and when, but it definatelly includes all food groups...
and when it comes to clothing, the only rule that applies for me is wearing what I feel comfortable in, comfortable means not having the need to always check how it looks on me which is what happens if I`m trying to pull off something that isn`t my style...when I forget completely what I have on, I can be myself without thinking about clothes...which is incidentaly when I`m gorgeous hm, chich and sexy for special occasions? yes, but I get to say what is a special occasion, and sometimes a trip to the grocery store can be it...

and this post pretty much satisfies my ego needs for the next month