board77

*lightens up immeasurably*

Umm ...

Actually, one of my fondest memories of this place is that first thread started in the Bike Racks. It made me laugh so hard that everyone rushed over there to hang out and smoke cigarettes and look for something to fight about so they could use the forum. What I love most about this place is that you guys are up for anything. You'll try anything once.

I think it's important that we treat conflict resolution with respect and not egg people on or interrupt them when they're trying to handle a dispute, but let's not lose our ability to laugh at ourselves either.

Probably it doesn't matter where either of those threads end up, and probably neither of them actually belongs in the Bike Racks. But I don't think either of them were meant disrespectfully, and I don't think they do any harm.

Just, um, for what it's worth.

Jn

Thanks Jny. And thanks too to Holby for providing some perspective.

I make a motion that in the future any and all disputes or disagreements be required to begin with butterfly huggles, skip the discussion period altogether, and proceed directly to the drinking. Anyone caught violating this rule should be required to make restitution in the form of donuts. To me.

Better keep that donut tax at a reasonable rate, Tinwe, or you'll be hoist on your own trebuchet.

Jn

Would that make him a lobbyist?

I just have one question ... can I mediate the dispute between Lidless and TP?

Also, I had a squizz at that first thread in Bikeracks, and I must say I behaved SHAMEFULLY!

Krispy Kremes, Wenchels or Dunkin' Donuts?

This is the current description under the Bike Racks forum title on the Board Index:

Quote:

Where members can go to resolve serious disagreements

If this thread is allowed to stand, someone might want to think about changing that.

Jnyusa wrote:

Umm ...

Actually, one of my fondest memories of this place is that first thread started in the Bike Racks. It made me laugh so hard that everyone rushed over there to hang out and smoke cigarettes and look for something to fight about so they could use the forum. What I love most about this place is that you guys are up for anything. You'll try anything once.

I think it's important that we treat conflict resolution with respect and not egg people on or interrupt them when they're trying to handle a dispute, but let's not lose our ability to laugh at ourselves either.

That first fun thread was entirely different from this one, IMO.
It joked about the fact that we might be needing the bike racks at all, and joked around with ideas of the other things you might be doing at a real school bike racks (smoking cigarttes, making out).

This one mocks the way people post in the bike racks, the way they try to solve conflicts that are a serious burden to them.
The "rules" tp has put up for her and TLE's thread mock bike racks procedure in general.

I just think there is a BIG difference between poking some friendly fun at ourselves (as in Alatar's old thread) and people openly showing their contempt for the bike racks procedure as such and mocking the participants who try to solve their conflicts there.

No more time now, I should have liked to say something on "lightening up" and putting too much stress on rules etc, will try to do so later.
Just wanted it on the record that as to "no one speaking up", this is member number three signing up for removing the thread.

Contempt?

WTF?

You will be deleting your posts as well ,right Cerin?

ADD: And if people continue to use "butterfly huggles" I'm leaving the boards kidding of course for those who can't take a joke.

Whatever.

As much as I don't want to, it is unfair for me to not respond publicly.

I was the person that originally complained privately to a Ranger about the thread. At the time, I had spent most of the little free time that I had in the previous couple of days not having fun here but agonizing over how to help resolve a serious dispute that I was mediating in the bike racks. I did (and do) feel that Lidless' thread mocked and disrespected those efforts, and it upset me quite a bit. It seems to me that given the timing of the thread started by Lidless that the primary purpose of it was in fact to mock those efforts.

Indeed, Lidless has confirmed that he started the thread knowing that it would upset people and that they would complain. Let's be honest here, a person as intelligent and perceptive as Lidless knew full well that the primary person that was going to be upset about the thread was me. So essentially he has admitted that he started the thread knowing that it would upset me. And why? To make the point that people needs to lighten up. I'm afraid doing something that I feel mocks and disrespects me is not going to make me lighten up. Its going to make me feel that maybe this isn't really the place for me after all.

Steve, you and I have a very different idea of what is important. I respect you a lot in many ways, and I appreciate the generosity of your spirit. I am not saying that I am right and you are wrong; you obviously feel very strongly about this or you would not have done what you did. But I just don't think our values are compatible. And I don't know what to do about that.

TheMary, I will not be deleting my posts in that farce of a Bike Racks thread. I will not accord it the respect of a real Bike Racks thread, it doesn't deserve it.

Well fuck I may as well just dive into the bucket of shit too.
I have been trying to avoid any kind of debates or serious threads since the summer because it just depresses me. Since I already got involved in this I may as well just see it through and let it out.

When I saw Lidless' post in the Bike Racks I was a bit taken aback.
That is something I wouldn't do. I am not saying it is inappropriate or wrong, it just isn't me. I like order and things in their proper place.
The fact that the thread seemed out of place to me, went against the way my mind works. And I knew as soon as I saw it that there would be complaints and I didn't think we needed any more bullshit around here.
Things are fairly raw here and I believed that an attempt at lightening up this place could have the opposite effect and just rub the already frayed nerves even more.

Then I stopped myself and considered.
I didn't start the thread Lidless did. He thinks differently than I do.
He isn't subjected to or bound by the way my mind works.
He did what he did according to the way he is. Who am I to judge him?
Why should I let a meaningless thread bug me just because I thought it was started in the wrong forum? My life is no different now than it was before. I am no worse off. I am not affronted because I never felt that I was being mocked.

Just because we think a certain way, a way different than Lidless (and thank God for that ) doesn't mean we can read things into his meaning or reasonings behind the thread.
He was never mocking in my opinion. He didn't post with contempt.
He seized an opportunity to make a joke as he always does. He attempted to lighten a cloudy atmosphere. Lets not make this something it isn't. The skin is a bit too thin around here. Lets stop making mountains out of molehills.

Everyone in this place needs to consider the other people here and how they feel.

Now enough of the bullshit. Stop bitching about a stupid thread.
And if you Steve can't come up with something funnier than a thread in BikeRacks, then you need to find some inspiration and quick.

Thank you and you guys may now resume amassing your armament for battle.

All this hoohaa about the debateable location of one thread. Jesus H Christ. What a sad fucking state of affairs this board and some of the posters have become.

Well, I knew Cerin wouldn't back down. She has no idea how to. Her manners have been appalling so far, from posting uninvited in a thread, to not PMing me, to not deleting or blanking her posts. Apparently she herself has decided the thread was not a true BR thread so courtesy and her own rules go out of the window.

Welcome truehobbit. You're a day later than your expected arrival time. The agreement you had with Estel was that you would try and avoid threads where you would have major disagreements with her. You didn't even last a week.

V-man, I never had you in mind, not once, not for a millisecond. No need to get super-sensitive like some other posters here. It's not contagious.



The whole purpose of the thread was to get people to chill. To step back and see that this is just a posting area on the internet and that is all. Estel's father, having been a pilot in Vietnam, never gets flustered. "Hey, think of it this way - today, I didn't get shot at." I've learned from him.

So yes, it was a light-hearted way - a bending, a stretching of the rules rather than a contemptuous breaking of them. Something that society needs to do from time to time to clear its head and remember that life is a party, not a dirge and a drudge.

And after the ToE debate, the CG/SF/et al constant flare ups, B77 has become a drudge to me. I've spent the last three weeks coming to it out of a sense of duty to my friends, rather than actually wanting to post.

And now we come to the crossroads. A few posters have complained that the letter of the law has been broken and correction must be made. Others, notably in Turf, have welcomed the thread as finally there being a bit of fun on the board.

And as ever, those former posters press and press the point causing disruption and yet another dirge falls on me and on the board.

So, should I make a stand, thus allowing more disruption on the board, or should I for the greater good just let it slide and ask for the thread to be deleted?

I hereby request that the thread be deleted.

I will let the small band of intransigent posters have their way for the sake of the board. They are incapable of reciprocating that act.

And that's why this board gets fucked up so frequently.

The occasional stretching of the rules is a healthy thing. Strict adherence every millisecond to them makes this place a lifeless thing.

Well done.

TORC II is now up and running.

I'm not deleting it.
Fire me if you want but this goes too far.
Deleting unwanted posts in a serious conflict settlement is one thing.
Deleting that thread to adhere to the rules because someone is affronted where no affront was intended is another.
I know I am backpedaling and changed my mind, but I reserve the right to change my mind and be all wishy washy.

Apparently I'm too late to change the outcome , but for the record:

The Bike Racks, by design, is the most heated and serious forum on b77. A lot of animosity is expressed there. And yet, it serves a transformative purpose, for anger to be turned into understanding. It's a place of reconciliation, and that has happened in some of the threads.

So if it's such a serious place, does a light-hearted thread belong there? YES! I think it belongs there even more than it belongs anywhere else. I did not read that thread as mocking the forum at all. I read it as bringing laughter and light into an often gloomy corner. Here is something in the form of a Bike Racks argument, but it is really just a silly joust.

I like silly jousts. We do need to lighten up, to playfully whack one another with nerf bats rather than bashing each other with the wooden ones.

It's very seldom that I disagree with Voronwe about anything, but this time I do.

It was gracious of Lidless to ask for the thread to be deleted in order to head off further disruption, but I hope we will heed his points.


Edit to take out extraneous word.

Why must the same group always put up a fight? This is not just "your" board and I'm gonna be bold enough to say that a certain group of you are certainly fucking it up, if not ruining it for some of the others. Of course this may go both ways, but at least we can take a joke.

Bullshit Steve don't you dare make that request. It's time other people learned that it's not just "their way or the highway".

Can't the thread just be moved? Say, to Turf?

Wasn't the problem that it was in the BikeRacks?

And, if a joke hurts someone, is it maybe possible that it has gone too far? Without being malicious or intended to hurt?

Why are we all taking our balls and going home? Why can't we look for middle ground? Or has that already been tried?

I care about people on all sides in this dispute. I do not see why it has to end like this.