What if there was a hidden and invisible forum like Thinking of England?
I know you want to be transparent, Lidless--so do I--but I don't think it's unreasonable to have some personal stuff out of sight. When I throw a party, I don't have the guests mingle in my bedroom. (I know--boring party.) Things like the birthday and home address threads could be there, and so could anything TORC-related.
On TORC right now, they're washing the blood off the walls, telling everyone nothing happened and besides they deserved it, and forbidding any discussion. Eliminating discussion here would have a similar flavor for me, and I think would be similarly unhealthy.
If we confined it out of sight, those who have moved on or to whom it's too painful would not have to see it, just as we've done with the sex forum. Casual visitors (or less than casual ones) would not be able to see it--as I assume would also be true for the sex forum. But most of the forum would be "clean" as you say.
Having privacy is not the same as having secrets.